For me, “Spirit-dependence” was the very opposite of how I lived my life, even as a Christian.
About 7 years ago I made a rash career decision without waiting on God’s direction, and because of this, we accumulated an enormous amount of debt. It was a source of much stress, marital tension, and triggered my depression, yet I still kept on depending on myself to fix and redeem this mistake I had made.
After we came to CrossWay, I started going to our Saturday morning prayer meetings. Now, I am not one to go to early morning ANYTHING let alone prayer, but each time I went, God would meet me and I would feel much more centered, hopeful, and free.
Soon, I couldn’t afford NOT to go regularly. As I prayed regularly for “financial breakthrough”, God did answer it, but it came in a form that is far greater than financial debt elimination. In the very process of going to God in prayer, we learned to depend not on ourselves, but on Him as our provider and counselor. We now have a deeper sense of security and freedom from financial stress and even other worries.
Today, the numbers haven’t changed much yet, but God has given me the desire to want nothing more than to live according to His Spirit.
Janet: My story is similar in that I am a pretty self-reliant person and private in many ways.
Shortly before coming to CrossWay, I developed clinical anxiety issues that came & went in small episodes but soon after we arrived here, I was paralyzed by the worst & longest anxiety period I had ever experienced.
This basically forced me to open my hands, open up to community and rely on prayer.
It was one of the hardest few months I have ever gone through but I am so grateful for it because looking back, I realize it was God calling me closer to Him.
Through this experience, God exposed the issues of my self-reliant heart that was keeping me from a full, rich, deep relationship with Him. I learned that it wasn’t my anxiety, my surroundings, my friends or my life stage that was keeping me from depending on God, it was my self standing in the way.
Through the prayers of this community and my own, I began to experience healing not only for my anxiety but of my own self-reliant heart.
by Takashi and Janet Koga